3.16.2009
Watched watchmen last tuesday on dearie's birthday.I love the graphics.Though I've heard of the comic but never do get the chance to read them.Its an interesting movie really but a tad too long.I was having a cramp hip from sitting that long in the theatres seat.Btw Doctor Manhattan should learn to wear underwear at all times.Not just when he is going for missions.His trouser snake was hanging and dangling for all the world to see.A happy willy I might say with all the attention its getting.A little too distracting.Heheheh...And yah,the President Nixon's character has a nose like a guy's penis.OMG!I am not kidding.I'm sure its a prosthetic nose.But still,do they have to make it in the resemblance of a willy nilly?A queer movie...
Anyway!!
Oh my gosh...I feel so boreddd.....
I am becoming like one of my cats...lazing around..
Now I know how they feel.No wonder they are so grumpy sumtimes.
Coz I am.I am bored to my very bones.I can hear my bones sighing from the lack of activities.
I wanna werk everyday,but they scheduled me for weekends only.The pay will suck definitely,and I NEED money for my school expenses as there is noone to support me now.Oh boyyy....I need to look for another job then.Thinking of werking nights at the macdonalds.Werk sucks,but still,money is going in.Maybe I'll ask for it tomorrow.haiz...
Sometimes I do envy children who has it all.Perfect parents,smooth sailing life..Its just envy.Not that I want to BE them.For everyone has problems.
But then again,I am still contented with what I have.
*I have a mother,though she is STILL not talking to me.
*I have me cats,they are the very best companion you can ever have.Not judgemental at all.
*I still have my education and my dream to fulfill, though that I have to work extra doubly hard.
*I have a bf who loves me for my imperfections and cares for me no matter the objections from my mum.Who is adamant about us settling down until after my university education(insya'Allah).Who is always there for me when I needed him most and never asking anything in return(except for those black forest ice-cream and magnum almond that we adore).Who is trying super hard to prove to people that he is not a failure.My bestfriend,my confidante,my pillar of strength,my everything.
*Lastly,I have myself.A person who never shows she is weak.Someone who is a little of an over achiever.Known solely for being a happy-go-lucky.Someone that loves her mother dearly and is head-over-heels in love with her bf.
I couldn't have been more greatful to how my life's wheel is turning me out to be.Every rock and bump and holes on and in the ground have scarred my wheel.I do say my wheel is looking worst by the minute but it just keps turning and turning.That is my determination to live.My passion to live life to the fullest.My faith in god that he will protect me along the way.Without these,then I might as well be a useless wheel lying at the side of the road.For they are what makes life worth living for.Without that,then you are just 'dead'.Like the stumbled wheel lying on its side.
haiz...anyway,better head down to the library then.Have books to return and borrow.Fines to pay.I'm just bored lah..hehehe..need to go out.Tuthelus then!
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|14:56|
2.19.2009
Taking a breather.....
Gosh...this is the toughest semester ever for me...The pressure from projects...and the thght of having to seat for 5 exams!!!....OMGosh...BUt good thing this will be my one and only tough semester...Feel like crying and my brain is squeezed to the very last drop of brain juice(eww..nasty thought)...but im still worried for my 2 weaker subs which is Design IC Application and MicroController...Arggghhh...gosh...gosshh ggggooooosssshhhh!!!
Haiz...breathe in....breathe out...breathe in...breathe out...
Apart from studies...life fell apart like shattered glass...Things took a turn for the worst last month and without my family or sweety,won't know how I could cope...All for you mum...Hard to admit but my studies were a little affected...But I'm pulling myself together..Haiz...sometimes,things can change within a second.
AND bitch,thanx to your mouth,things happen the way it is.So I hope you have no conscious at all,for a guilt THIS big...must be a very hard burden to carry.Haiz..to think our own flesh and blood stab us..who are we to trust now if own family do this to us.
But its okay...from infancy till my adolescence, it has always been us...And it will continue to remain that way....We've never been happier and although it gets tough just to get by,insya'Allah we will still survive....
Anyway....Just to get by with all the stress piling up,I dyed my hair!!!I love the colour!!!!hehe..but had to dye my hair twice to get the colour I want...And...I painted my nails..with stickers on them..hehe..Sweety LOVEs it if I paint my nails...hehehe..he helped me to paint them once..heheh..so sweet..Neway,I love doing a french tip..I'll mix any 2 colours and just knock myself dead if them.hehehe.The current one is a transparent base,with white tip.and just small sticker on my thumb,middle and pinky finger. thinking of keeping the clear base but changing the tip colour.Well,that will have to wait after my exams..enough fooling around for now.
Well,back to stupid mugging!Take care....
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|13:37|
12.03.2008
Ibu,tidak selalu ku mengucapkan kata2 ini.Tetapi,kalau boleh,akan ku lindungimu dari segala dengki khianat dan kebohongan.Kamu adalah manusia yang selalu ku sanjung,dan akan selalu ku ambil berat tentangmu bila2 masa sahaja.Tidak mengapa jikalau mereka menikam kami dari belakang,dengan dalamnya hingga tidak terhingga peritnyer.Tetapi jikalau boleh,akan ku mengambil segala keperitan itu dan sanggupku tanggung sumernya supaya ibu tidak akan menangis dan air mukamu tidak menjadi sungguh sayu.Ibu,kesedihanmu dapat ku rasakan berkali-kali gandanya.Ku sedar akan segala pengorbanan yang telah ibu lakukan untuk membesarkan kami.Ku berjanji denganmu yang ku tidak akan memaafkan mereka setelah melukaimu seperti ini.Dengan doamu dan kepercayaanmu terhadapku,insya'Allah,kami dapat berjaya.Biarkan mereka berkata2 tentang kami,biarkan aper yang telah mereka lakukan terhadap kami kerana satu hari,akan kami tunjukkan kepada mereka.Ibuku,kamu berhak mendapat yang terbaik dan segala apa yang ku lakukan,hanya untuk mu dan untuk mu sahaja.Walaupun dengan segala kekayaan di dunia ini,tidak dapat ku menggantikan untuk segala pengorbananmu selama ini.Ku sangat sayangkan mu Ibu kerana tidak dapatku jumpa penggantinya untukmu walau ke hujung dunia ku mencari.
Dari anakmu yang tersayang,
Zuhairah
Mum,I know I dun say this often.But if I could,I would protect you from all these fakeness and manipulation.You are the most dearest person in the whole world for me and I would always make u my one and only priority.Its okay mum if people stab us in the back,so deep that it hurt us so much.I would take away your pain and bear it all myself,just so I would not see you cry,see your dejected expression.Cause mum,your sadness,is amplified to me.I know all the sacrifices you made for us.We survived without them in the first place,and we WILL survive without them in the future.I swear to u mum that I will never forgive them for the pain they have caused you.With your prayers and your trust in me, I promise you mum insya'Allah,we will be successful.NO matter what people say about us,no matter what they did to us,we will one day prove them wrong.Mum,you deserve the best and everything that I'm doing will be for you,and only you.Even with all the riches of the world,it can never be use to pay you for your sacrifices.I love you mum and I can never find a replacement for you even if I search to ends of the world.
From your beloved daughter,
Zuhairah
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|21:41|
11.08.2008
Hello Teacher!!
Well well,had a parents meeting this morning at TP.Dad seemed hesitant to go as he was busy at work.I was kinda upset actually as this would be the first time he would get involve with my studies and he wants to bail out.I bet he noticed the hostility in my voice and thus decided to come down.But i cant help it,I was dissapointed.Anyway,when dad arrived,he went to talk to my course manager first as Mr Low was still talking to Andre's aunt.Can u believe only Andre and I attended the meeting,for our class that is?Gosh..hehe.When dad was talking to Mr Low,I was so scared,hehehe...wonder what will he say about me.But then,it was all good..hehehe!Mr Low has praises for me and he was thoroughly happy with my performance in school.Dad was beaming and truly a momentous occation for me.Never before can I show him how I'm doing school as he didnt seem to care.But today,syukur alhamdulillah,he realises his priorities.:D
Anyway I was shocked that my initial semester result was 3.26!!!!*faintz...that to me was a wow!i mean from 2.67 to 3.26!OMGosh...but too bad because of last sem,it pulled my grades down..but you know what?It is an accomplishment for me and I will work super duper hard to increase those numbers up.Heehee...
Then there's an unexpected call from Rafiq...I was shocked when I saw his number flashing on my fone.He just wanted to call to say hi.I'm like,"Is this for real??".Hahaha!We talked for a while as usual,the normal banter that goes on between us.I should really buy 4D.hehehe...Neway nice talking to you nyah...lagi 10 tahun aru ko call aku lagik eh.:p
Hmmmz...can't wait for sweety to be home tomorrow..So excited..hehe..Its indeed torturous,cant stop thinking about him..haiz...Miss u lah syg...another day and you'll be home..yay!!hehe..
Counting down to my birthday.1hr and 45 mins more..hehe!yay me!!...
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|22:15|
Wow!!!Surprise!!!
Today was definitely a happy day for me...hehehe...Gwen and I gathered a few of our friends to come and celebrate our birthdays together...It was quite a turnout as I didnt expect 14 ppl to make it even if it was a short notice.Really appreciate your presence guys and it does mean alot to us.To those who can't make ,its really okay as your wish(advance as it is) is indeed truly appreciated.Got some unexpected presents btw.All from the china guys..awwwwwwww....they're the sweetest ever...got a shirt,a teddy and a pencil holder..hehehe..I shall take a pic of it soon.Speaking of which,I shall pester Xu Nuo a.k.a Alfian,to pass me the pics.hehehe..love you guyz!!!Hugz!!...
But unfortunately dearie isn't in town.Went off to thailand for a little holiday courtesy of his camp...Haiz..he's only been gone yesterday and will be home this sunday's evening,but still it feels different to know your loved one is not in Singapore.Its like you'll be wondering how he's enjoying himself(I do trust tat even if its a massage it'll be minus the EXTRA services...)hehehe....and anyway,U cant message him to tell him u miss him and stuffs...haiz..its gonna be torturous.But no worries,I can get through it.Just hope that he'll be home safe and sound,bringing home prezzies for my bday on sun...heeeee:D...*clears throat*But most importantly he'll be home safe*note serious face*..heheh..anywhoo,doesnt matter u read it or not,but just wanna say Im missing you so much and love u sweety....come home safe...
Well,pics will be up soon,but for now,Au revoir!!!(psst!french class is sooo cooool!!)
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|00:05|
10.27.2008
26th of the 26th..
I know an anniversary is just the same old thing every month and year.But yesterday for us it is special as its the 26th month of our anniversary celebrated on the 26th of Oct 08.Yay to us!!hehehe....Unfortunately,has we were kinda a little tight on a budget,we did not actually went out to celebrate.Just drop down to town to the sony ericsson service centre.Service there is definitely not to my liking.Just think,my fone is barely 2 months old,would I purposely pry the button out?Its ridiculous!and to think I have to fork out abt 50 bucks to have it fixed when I barely have 5 buck in my wallet.What are warranty for when you cant even use it.I shall write a letter of complaint then.Dearie was pissed too.In fact,I was shocked when he spoke up to the person.Its not like him to voice out that way.You made my day sweetheart.
After that terrible ordeal,I had no mood to walk around orchard.Told sweety I wanted to go home.Bought him an ice-cream from those roadside vendors..hehehe...Kinda an anni gift..(damn..) hahha..I shall make it up to him as daddy manage to get a contract at the Sentosa Gulf Club and insya'Allah we'll get to ride around on my new ride;)...Insya'Allah..heheh...daddy has already given the green light to purchase any four-wheeler.WHEE!!hehe..But still,nothing is final..Hopefully I'll get it though...:D Anyway,we just dropped off at IMM to buy some stuffs for mummy,den we walked home holding hands,just enjoying the company of each other.Thanx for accompanying me Dearie.Love you sweets...
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|20:43|
10.25.2008
Back to School
Its the first week of my new semester in the 2nd year.It seems like yesterday when I first stepped into school.The whole year in school have been nothing but a blurry and stitches whiz of memory.I'm trying to get used to Attiyah not being in the same class as I am..Haiz..miss the 'girl' bond we always had in class...The times when we gossip,talk about anything,laughing our guts out...haiz..I miss u lah attiyah.But I will sneak into her French lecture whenever I can and we will try to have lunch together:D...
Neway,now that I am an official Microelectronics student,the course does not seem that flowery as I thought it would be.All the new terminologies,and symbols and whatnots have been reducing my brain to the size of a pea.I'm crying internally from the pain that the subjects are putting me through.My internal clock have yet to adjust to the timing after 2 months of slacking.I'm gving my self till next week to adapt.But by the end of the day,all I want is to succeed.For myself and for my parents.So whatever hardships that are being whipped at me now,I shall just suck in the pain and trudge forward,slowly but surely I shall reach my destination.I have so many dreams but yet one to be pursued.Insya'Allah..I shall hope for the best.A pilot,or an engineer...Both drems shall be my inspiration.
Never laugh at a person when they say they have a dream of becoming somebody.Even though it may seem impossible.Cause a person who is the wisest,is one who has a dream to hold onto.
FoR Once..I beLieVe....
|18:28|
